Don't you understand I already have a plan

What the freaking barf am I doing? I am standing in line for the emotional roller coaster of my life, and I am freaking out just being in line. Tonight was not good. I have been spending most of my nights with the premee, having a surprisingly good time and finding myself thinking hey why not? Then as I start to let myself get a little involved emotionally....Murphy's law would have it the cold front comes in. Friday night was amazing and I had such a wonderful time and things were just so comfortable. Tonight however the comfort level diminished and I realized I would never give a rats behind about gears of war and the walk we went on ended with an awkward run in with an unexpected crowd.

My goodbye to the other is tomorrow. It's going to be hard.

So as I stand realizing I am in the group that is going to get in the roller coaster next, I want to turn around and get out of line...but this sick part of me really loves the ride. There's something about being at the top of a drop in a roller coaster that just appeals to me. Evening knowing the thrill is going to last all of 5 mins, and then you walk off the ride feeling nauseous and disoriented.