Where do I/we stand?

This is a terrific question my friends. And it seems like I am always looking for the answer to it. So me and Topher( I decided to stop calling him the premee) have been hanging out a great deal lately. I really like him. He makes me laugh and during the days where work seems crappy and I am sick of people...knowing that I will see him at the end of the day just makes things seem ok. I am not trying to be weird or mushy, but its true. Everything we do leads me to believe we are dating( I don't think he would be too impressed if I went on a date with someone else tonight and visa versa) But we aren't dating, at least nothing has been said. And there in lies the rub...because no matter how hard I tried to convince myself to just say it yesterday, I couldn't. Because every time I have that conversation...things nosedive and careen out of control and there I am left alone to figure out how long I had been wasting my time on that person.

Do you always have to outright say it? I tend to believe so, because if you don't then you can just back out with ease at anytime because...you weren't dating. I have to give a shout out to the girls who told them if he hurt me they would beat his sorry butt in a sketchy back alley on the north side. I am being so gaurded it's horrible, but necessary because you can only get hit by the "I just though we were really good friends/heck no" bus so many times.